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    SAGE VS.


    Sage vs. Godzilla

     May 18 2014 | more 

    A movie that reduces Sage and Gabe to gibbering children… and that’s a good thing.

    • Jegsimmons

      i loved godzilla ’14

      shit was awesome.
      His roar, radiation breath, tail whip, and that ending was pumping the crowd up like the rock at WWE with free mountain dew.

      i mean it was an orgy in that theater, fucking orgasms and spontaneous pregnancies everywhere. Im pretty sure im a parent after that premiere.

      And yes, its a slow build up, but for me, it works because by the time shit starts throwing down is fucking clash of the gods.

    • Jegsimmons

      Also on the Radiation food part, that makes sense since the era before the dinosaurs we had a weaker ozone layer (actually, none) and more sun rays coming in, which is infact radiation.

      so just like how plants use radiation for raw energy (and by extension every animal to a lesser degree) it doesnt seem to far fetched that a moveing giant creature can convert radiation into fuel for its cells by eating fissile materials or animals who absorb raw sun radiation.

      now obviously thats BS in reality, but it at least follows a consistent logic based on real world science.

      And in that sense the movie did well with its science.

    • tanner martens

      the interesting thing is that if you looked closely at the fish tank in bryan Cranston’s old home it’s labeled “mothra” which I think is a hint at the sequel.

    • Jerry Forbe

      Loved the movie, but dammit I hated how they kept teasing you until the very end. I saw that the movie budget was much lower than other movies though, so I could understand that they would have to cut out some fights for financial reasons. Sources tell me the movie had a budget of $160 mil but then again I don’t know the average movie budget.

      I actually almost screamed out “NO!” at the scene where they just cut the part where Godzilla and Mothra started fighting in the city. The only gripe I’ve had with the movie is that the military commanders didn’t seem to think about the lives of citizens when deciding to nuke the city. Though, Ken Watanabe’s watch reminding them of Hiroshima seemed to imply there are still lives at stake when nuking your own country.

      • Christian Neihart

        That’s not Mothra. That’s MUTO. Here is Mothra http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mothra

        • Jerry Forbe

          I thought it would be appropriate, because they called it mothra in the video… didn’t you watch?

          • Christian Neihart

            I did…ish. Up until the first commercial break.

    • Josh

      Gabe looks so different without the beard.

      Grow it back!!!

    • birdy the critic

      Glad you enjoyed this movie, Sage. I had heard so many reviews saying that the payoff at the end wasn’t enough to excuse the slow pace and boredom of the rest of the movie. I’m glad you thought otherwise. I love Godzilla and have seen all and own most of the movies. You owe it to yourself to watch Godzilla: Final Wars. It’s 2 hours of the most insane action ever. If you need more reason, here’s a scene from the movie where the fandom collectively screamed with ecstasy.

    • Mime Diggity

      This movie was ruined for me so much so that I have to go see it a second time. Just because the audience was shit. Everything awesome about this movie was shit on by the audience. Not one person in the theatre seemed like they enjoyed it. I actually had people sitting around me bitching about his size, making jokes about the female monster’s egg sac looking like genitala, and some people actually said during the fight that there was to much godzilla in his own movie. They left a bitter taste in my mouth so I’m gonna have to go back tonight, and watch it again.

      • Jegsimmons

        what area of the world do you live in where the audience was consisted entirely of bastard people?

        • Mime Diggity

          In the army in south Georgia. So everyone there was a bunch of semi-adults who think they are still in high-school or college.

          • Jegsimmons

            huh, i was at a theater just a few miles away from the base in anniston alabama and the troops in there were pumped up.

            must be a timezone thing.

            • Mime Diggity

              yeah I’m pretty sure it is since the same thing happened when avengers came out. Though when I got to see it in Texas everyone was pumped, and I actually enjoyed it.

          • LilWalker

            dude…are you stationed at Fort Stewart? I saw the movie at Liberty Stadiums friday and they were so rowdy!

            • Mime Diggity

              yeah I go to Liberty Stadiums. Since I walk everywhere I never get to go on friday. Though I’ve heard decent things about the friday crowd.

          • Jason olin

            I live in North Georgia (former army soldier myself) and the theater was full of cheering people for this movie.

    • Lina Jones

      Battra would be a more fitting nickname, I would think. 😉

    • Christian Neihart

      For me, the movie was okay leaning towards good. Godzilla wasn’t in the movie enough and they killed Bryan Cranston way too early. However that final fight was awesome!

      • Vandegraff

        I think they made a good decision to limit Godzilla’s presence, which would have been diminished by over-exposure. As it was, every single time he showed up, it was like a fresh, awesome punch in the gut.

        Bryan Cranston was a splendid decoy protagonist. Once the plot got moving, his character would have been excess baggage, which would have been a detriment to both the character and the film overall. He had no background that would have allowed him to contribute to the solution. Instead, he died knowing–and having it acknowledged–that he was vindicated in
        his suspicions, not merely a crazy guy ranting about imaginary

        I’m surprised that you consider the military to have been ineffective. This is one of the rare movies in which a military force is portrayed in a positive light, rather than coming across as gung-ho violent idiots or obstructive skeptics. Of course they were having trouble evacuating citizens–they had no established plans for dealing with Giant Monster Attack scenarios, and VERY little time to come up with one on the fly, given how quickly the situation was advancing. I was impressed by how well they managed to apply standard disaster-relief protocols by arranging for transportation, directing people out of town and into shelters, and so on. (That said, they DID earn a couple of head-slapper moments. How would anyone in a helicopter circling a mountain miss a gigantic–truly GIGANTIC–hole in the side of it?!)

        • Christian Neihart

          I still maintain the military was ineffective because of its inability to evacuate everyone out of the bay area. The main piece of evidence that I base this on is when they are showing the projected path of Muto and its has San Francisco, Oakland, and the rest of the Bay Area in its sights. At that point, the admiral should have picked up the phone and told the CA National Guard that he wants everyone out of the Bay Area five minutes ago. There were still people inside the buildings when Muto came rearing its ugly head.

    • butts

      Sage does not wear antiperspirant.

    • Gabe, where’s your chin scruff? 🙁

    • rudy023

      You can both still share your thoughts on the new Xmen movie, just a little later than usual, or Bennett can discuss it in a future Tool Shed.
      Also, glad to see you both liked Godzilla. It is nice when a modern remake/retelling/update/etc. gets things right.

    • Thomas Leitner

      You got something wrong:
      Godzilla atomic breathed Mothra before, finished him with a tailwhip, then the building falls on him.
      Then he used the breath a second time for decapitation.

    • WolftheBlackHunter

      they are the Muto and they are american and mothra.

      Glad that you guys enjoyed the movie.

    • flyingcow84

      Mothra isn’t tell the second movie but i think you know this they where just Muto male and Muto female